The Cubs get swept and I don't care

Well, I do care, but to some extent its out of sight, out of mind for me. I'm spending the week in Nashville, Tennessee, where I attended last night's US/Morocco game. The US team's performance was beyond frustrating. They dominated posession through most of the game, turning up the pressure in the final minutes to create a series of golden opportunities. Sadly none of the US players showed an instinct for the final touch into the back of the net, and as the game reached ninety minutes Morocco counterattacked, the normally reliable Steve Cherundolo fell asleep, and suddenly defeat had been snatched from the jaws of a tie.

There was good news. I enjoyed taking a friend from college to his first soccer game. I enjoyed singing "Rock the Casbah" in the supporters section. I sort of enjoyed running into some friendly Moroccans drinking Heineken at Rippa's Barbeque on Broadway. I really enjoyed quieting their bragging with an innocent "Good luck in the World Cup!" (they didn't qualify.)

I also enjoyed running into the most badass soccer player in American history outside a Nashville bar at 1am. I was sitting on the porch with some friends, when I swear I saw Oguchi Onyewu walk down the street. One of the people with me shouted "Gooch!" and he seemed to react, but we weren't certain it was him. Thirty minutes later he walked by in the opposite direction, and this time responded to my friend's "Gooch!" with a wave. I think this may push Marcelo Balboa down to second on the list of "best soccer defenders I've seen in a social setting." Coolness.

Oh, and the Cubs got swept by the Marlins. Can we fire Dusty then find a loophole in Hendry's extension and fire him too please?

posted by Scott at 4:13 PM : |

 

Trying to repress the hate

I don't want to be a one-note hater, but damn if this franchise doesn't spend every single day trying to come up with new ways to make me hate them. Last night I sat down to write about the Cubs signing of Tony Freaking Womack. I wanted to write something honest yet not a pure hatchet job, but the absurdity of this team signing that player was just too great. There's really no way to soft-sell management's defense latest move, and with the insipid balderdash angle already covered at Gonfalon, I decided to go to sleep and try to think happy thoughts...

... which were promptly replaced by crushing despair at the sight of yet another putrid offensive performance. The Cubs as a team managed a .071/.133/.0715 AVG/OBP/SLG Friday afternoon for a .204 OPS. They did it against their crosstown rivals, although how anyone can consider a AA-lineup like this a fit rival for the World Champs I can't tell you.

And so I have only two choices. I can post more hate. I can decry everything about everyone associated with the franchise. I can go to thesaurus.com in an effort to find adjectives colorful enough to express my feelings about Baker and Hendry while keeping the site family-friendly. Or I can obey the "if you can't say anything nice" maxim, and just go to bed. So... good night. May the Tribune company divest themselves of the Cubs by the time I wake up.

posted by Scott at 4:14 AM : |

 

Its just awful

Those were the words of my Chicago grandmother on the phone tonight when I asked her if she'd been watching the Cubs. The Cubs were National League champions when she was born, but the intervening years have not been as kind. I'm not going to claim the last two weeks have set a new low, but even our Cubs haven't been this dismal too often. Today was the twelth loss in thirteen games. If they can't beat Livan Hernandez tomorrow, they'll match the worst fourteen game stretch in franchise history.

Sunday's offensive output might have been worse than the production in any other game in this putrid streak. Clay Hensley held the Cubs to two hits, a walk (thanks Neifi!), and no runs in a ninety-one pitch complete game shutout. It was only the second shutout in the majors this year in which the pitcher threw less than 100 pitches. The other was by Chris Capuano (wait for it) two weeks ago against the Chicago Cubs.

Despite my grandmother's optimisim ("Kerry is coming back soon, maybe things will get better"), the season is effectively over with 125 games left to play. We're left with hoping Dusty gets fired, hoping Prior and/or Wood can come back and show their careers aren't over, hoping Murton or Cedeno or Pie can break out, and hoping we don't find ourselves eighty-eight years old and still waiting on Cubs management to stop making the same mistakes they've been making for the last century.

posted by Scott at 3:15 AM : |

 

HA HA HA HA HA

I just read this story from the San Fran Chron. Apparently, Dusty is "mildly annoyed" that the Cubs haven't extended him. In fairness, Dusty denied saying it, and actually volunteered that he shouldnt be getting an extension now anyway:

"At this point, when you're losing, you can't be annoyed about nothing but losing. How do you expect to be offered a contract when the team just lost eight in a row? Honestly. I'm being as honest as I can be.''

At least someone has some perspective. Nonetheless, the Sun-Times still says Baker is expected to get that extension before the year is out. My question is how far above .500 (or how close to .500) would the Cubs have to get before management would stick their neck out and resign him? Surely the anger that would follow extending Baker today at five games under would be too much for Hendry to brave, wouldn't it? Are we safe then, at five games under? What about at .500? Would they extend Baker if he was at .500? Don't forget, they can always blame injuries and say everything would be going according to plan if only Lee and Prior and Wood had been healthy.

I'm going to guess that as long as we're under .500, we're safe. If we ever get our heads up above water though, watch out. Here's hoping for sub-.500 the rest of the way (or the most miraculous resurrection-cum-playoff run in baseball history of course.)

posted by Scott at 4:01 AM : |

 

The Damage is Done

For the first time since April, the Cubs looked like a major league baseball team last night. Carlos Zambrano was dominant, the offense pounded out eight runs on eight hits, we held Bonds at 713 and won the game 8-1. Too little, too late.

Here's a list of things that happened during the worst stretch of hitting in franchise history:

• The Cubs went 1-10.
• The Cubs scored thirteen runs, a franchise-low for an eleven game stretch.
• The Cubs fell from 13-8 two behind Cinicinnati, to 14-18 6.5 back.
• The Cubs fell from .619 (sixth best winning percentage in baseball) to .455 (20th best).
• The Cubs BP playoff odds fell from 29.3% to 1.8%.
• The season, effectively, drew to a close.

But hey, at least we've got Jim Hendry locked up for years to come. Just wait till next year!
posted by Scott at 12:56 PM : |

 

New lows

I just updated the world's saddest post at Gonfalon. If you haven't looked, it basically says that this years Cubs have set or tied the franchise record for fewest runs scored over a five-game span, a six-game span, 7, 8, 9, 10, and now an eleven-game span. For a while '06 was running neck and neck with a particularly ugly June of 1963, but the cream is really rising to the top now as 2006 has grabbed sole posession of record after record as this dismal stretch has worn on.

Tonight the run total was one (the loneliest number, since shutouts seem much more common.) What does it say about the team when the highlight of their week- heck, their whole season- is a home-run saving catch in a 6-1 loss continuing an eight-game losing streak? And why wasn't Juan Pierre in the outfield last time a roid-monkey tried to make home run history against us? And do I have to fly to Vegas and put $200 on the Cubs to win for us to ever win another game?

posted by Scott at 3:53 AM : |

 

Counting my reasons to live

1- The chance that a meteor made of solid gold might fall from the sky and land in my backyard
2- Greg Maddux's 2006 performance
3- ???
posted by Scott at 1:58 AM : |

 

Absent

Me, yes, and the Cubs offense as well. I just posted some numbers putting the recent futility in context over at Gonfalon, but I have a confession that I need to make here.

Its my fault.

Last Thursday I flew from Atlanta to Vegas. In the first 24 hours, I did nothing but eat, sleep, and play poker, and won a grand total of zero hands. Zero. As in, none. In 24 hours. I was the anti-Bauer.

The next twenty-four hours were little better, and as the third day of my trip dawned I was down some $300 without a winning session or lasting more than 30 minutes in any of the four tournaments I had played. My three travelling companions and I entered yet another tournament, and fifteen minutes later I was ousted again. I wandered to the sports book. I'm not brazen enough to think I have a +EV edge in the sports book, but I couldn't bear the thought of putting any more money into poker and a coin-toss sports bet seemed like a comforting alternative. I looked over the board, and somewhere in the back of my head a little voice started talking. It said something like "when everything else has turned its back on you, what's the one thing you can count on?"

I knew what the answer was. "The Cubs failing." But I shoved the voice away and headed back to the poker room. There I found my three friends- guys I have thrashed in our home game week in and week out for years- sitting side by side by side at the final table. It was time to bet against the Cubs.

I returned to the sports book, and with a final check of Chris Capauano's ERA I dropped $200 on the Milwaukee Brewers +120. I then returned to my hotel room for a quick nap. Two hours later I opened one eye and checked the ticker on the deuce- Cubs 0, Brewers 7. Milwaukee tacked on two more before it was over, and I went on to finish ahead in every ring session the rest of the trip and go deep in to two tourneys as well.

Of course, what you know now and I didn't know then was I had personally sent the Cubs into a historic offensive tailspin they show no signs of getting out of. I feel bad about it- really I do- but its mitigated by the knowledge that Dusty's managing and Hendry's roster would have probably done it if I hadn't. Stupid Cubs.

posted by Scott at 3:46 AM : |