Cubs HBO Documentary Drinking Game

As you may have noticed, updates have been non-existent this summer. I'm simply out of things to say about the Cubs management from Hendry on up. On any given day, the most relevant news to our chances of winning a World Series are on the business page where we see if the Tribune is coming any closer to selling the team.

That said, I'm planning to get some fun out of the HBO documentary airing tonight, one way or the other. Chris Y of Yarbage Cub Review was at my poker game last week, and we agreed the only way to watch such a film was to drink the pain away. I can't afford to knock myself out on a school night, so I'm recording it and we're going to relive lifetimes of suffering this weekend. Mention of a goat, take a drink. Mention of a curse, take a drink. Mention of Bartman, take a drink. We may not make it through the weekend. Once we formalize the rules, we'll post them here. Wish us luck.

posted by Scott at 12:35 PM : |

 

Gut und Evil (I dont know "evil" in German)

Two fans from the US/Ghana game Thursdaz. Guess which one I blame for the loss?
posted by Scott at 7:37 AM : |

 

Roadtrip

Tuesday the Cubs lost, scored one run, and drafted a toolsy project outfielder considered by most a reach at #13 overall. The good news is, I'm leaving for Germany tomorrow, and I think the EU stand against torture includes a prohibition on televising Cubs games. If it doesn't, it should.

If you're curious what I'm up to over there, visit the aptly named Scott's World Cup Blog. There's not much there yet, but I'll be posting stories and pictures once I arrive in Berlin Friday and on through the rest of my trip. Till then, go Estados Unidos. Oh, and go Dusty (and take Hendry and MacPhail with you.) Ha. Sigh.

posted by Scott at 1:12 AM : |

 

The Cubs get swept and I don't care

Well, I do care, but to some extent its out of sight, out of mind for me. I'm spending the week in Nashville, Tennessee, where I attended last night's US/Morocco game. The US team's performance was beyond frustrating. They dominated posession through most of the game, turning up the pressure in the final minutes to create a series of golden opportunities. Sadly none of the US players showed an instinct for the final touch into the back of the net, and as the game reached ninety minutes Morocco counterattacked, the normally reliable Steve Cherundolo fell asleep, and suddenly defeat had been snatched from the jaws of a tie.

There was good news. I enjoyed taking a friend from college to his first soccer game. I enjoyed singing "Rock the Casbah" in the supporters section. I sort of enjoyed running into some friendly Moroccans drinking Heineken at Rippa's Barbeque on Broadway. I really enjoyed quieting their bragging with an innocent "Good luck in the World Cup!" (they didn't qualify.)

I also enjoyed running into the most badass soccer player in American history outside a Nashville bar at 1am. I was sitting on the porch with some friends, when I swear I saw Oguchi Onyewu walk down the street. One of the people with me shouted "Gooch!" and he seemed to react, but we weren't certain it was him. Thirty minutes later he walked by in the opposite direction, and this time responded to my friend's "Gooch!" with a wave. I think this may push Marcelo Balboa down to second on the list of "best soccer defenders I've seen in a social setting." Coolness.

Oh, and the Cubs got swept by the Marlins. Can we fire Dusty then find a loophole in Hendry's extension and fire him too please?

posted by Scott at 4:13 PM : |

 

Trying to repress the hate

I don't want to be a one-note hater, but damn if this franchise doesn't spend every single day trying to come up with new ways to make me hate them. Last night I sat down to write about the Cubs signing of Tony Freaking Womack. I wanted to write something honest yet not a pure hatchet job, but the absurdity of this team signing that player was just too great. There's really no way to soft-sell management's defense latest move, and with the insipid balderdash angle already covered at Gonfalon, I decided to go to sleep and try to think happy thoughts...

... which were promptly replaced by crushing despair at the sight of yet another putrid offensive performance. The Cubs as a team managed a .071/.133/.0715 AVG/OBP/SLG Friday afternoon for a .204 OPS. They did it against their crosstown rivals, although how anyone can consider a AA-lineup like this a fit rival for the World Champs I can't tell you.

And so I have only two choices. I can post more hate. I can decry everything about everyone associated with the franchise. I can go to thesaurus.com in an effort to find adjectives colorful enough to express my feelings about Baker and Hendry while keeping the site family-friendly. Or I can obey the "if you can't say anything nice" maxim, and just go to bed. So... good night. May the Tribune company divest themselves of the Cubs by the time I wake up.

posted by Scott at 4:14 AM : |

 

Its just awful

Those were the words of my Chicago grandmother on the phone tonight when I asked her if she'd been watching the Cubs. The Cubs were National League champions when she was born, but the intervening years have not been as kind. I'm not going to claim the last two weeks have set a new low, but even our Cubs haven't been this dismal too often. Today was the twelth loss in thirteen games. If they can't beat Livan Hernandez tomorrow, they'll match the worst fourteen game stretch in franchise history.

Sunday's offensive output might have been worse than the production in any other game in this putrid streak. Clay Hensley held the Cubs to two hits, a walk (thanks Neifi!), and no runs in a ninety-one pitch complete game shutout. It was only the second shutout in the majors this year in which the pitcher threw less than 100 pitches. The other was by Chris Capuano (wait for it) two weeks ago against the Chicago Cubs.

Despite my grandmother's optimisim ("Kerry is coming back soon, maybe things will get better"), the season is effectively over with 125 games left to play. We're left with hoping Dusty gets fired, hoping Prior and/or Wood can come back and show their careers aren't over, hoping Murton or Cedeno or Pie can break out, and hoping we don't find ourselves eighty-eight years old and still waiting on Cubs management to stop making the same mistakes they've been making for the last century.

posted by Scott at 3:15 AM : |

 

HA HA HA HA HA

I just read this story from the San Fran Chron. Apparently, Dusty is "mildly annoyed" that the Cubs haven't extended him. In fairness, Dusty denied saying it, and actually volunteered that he shouldnt be getting an extension now anyway:

"At this point, when you're losing, you can't be annoyed about nothing but losing. How do you expect to be offered a contract when the team just lost eight in a row? Honestly. I'm being as honest as I can be.''

At least someone has some perspective. Nonetheless, the Sun-Times still says Baker is expected to get that extension before the year is out. My question is how far above .500 (or how close to .500) would the Cubs have to get before management would stick their neck out and resign him? Surely the anger that would follow extending Baker today at five games under would be too much for Hendry to brave, wouldn't it? Are we safe then, at five games under? What about at .500? Would they extend Baker if he was at .500? Don't forget, they can always blame injuries and say everything would be going according to plan if only Lee and Prior and Wood had been healthy.

I'm going to guess that as long as we're under .500, we're safe. If we ever get our heads up above water though, watch out. Here's hoping for sub-.500 the rest of the way (or the most miraculous resurrection-cum-playoff run in baseball history of course.)

posted by Scott at 4:01 AM : |

 

The Damage is Done

For the first time since April, the Cubs looked like a major league baseball team last night. Carlos Zambrano was dominant, the offense pounded out eight runs on eight hits, we held Bonds at 713 and won the game 8-1. Too little, too late.

Here's a list of things that happened during the worst stretch of hitting in franchise history:

• The Cubs went 1-10.
• The Cubs scored thirteen runs, a franchise-low for an eleven game stretch.
• The Cubs fell from 13-8 two behind Cinicinnati, to 14-18 6.5 back.
• The Cubs fell from .619 (sixth best winning percentage in baseball) to .455 (20th best).
• The Cubs BP playoff odds fell from 29.3% to 1.8%.
• The season, effectively, drew to a close.

But hey, at least we've got Jim Hendry locked up for years to come. Just wait till next year!
posted by Scott at 12:56 PM : |

 

New lows

I just updated the world's saddest post at Gonfalon. If you haven't looked, it basically says that this years Cubs have set or tied the franchise record for fewest runs scored over a five-game span, a six-game span, 7, 8, 9, 10, and now an eleven-game span. For a while '06 was running neck and neck with a particularly ugly June of 1963, but the cream is really rising to the top now as 2006 has grabbed sole posession of record after record as this dismal stretch has worn on.

Tonight the run total was one (the loneliest number, since shutouts seem much more common.) What does it say about the team when the highlight of their week- heck, their whole season- is a home-run saving catch in a 6-1 loss continuing an eight-game losing streak? And why wasn't Juan Pierre in the outfield last time a roid-monkey tried to make home run history against us? And do I have to fly to Vegas and put $200 on the Cubs to win for us to ever win another game?

posted by Scott at 3:53 AM : |

 

Counting my reasons to live

1- The chance that a meteor made of solid gold might fall from the sky and land in my backyard
2- Greg Maddux's 2006 performance
3- ???
posted by Scott at 1:58 AM : |

 

Absent

Me, yes, and the Cubs offense as well. I just posted some numbers putting the recent futility in context over at Gonfalon, but I have a confession that I need to make here.

Its my fault.

Last Thursday I flew from Atlanta to Vegas. In the first 24 hours, I did nothing but eat, sleep, and play poker, and won a grand total of zero hands. Zero. As in, none. In 24 hours. I was the anti-Bauer.

The next twenty-four hours were little better, and as the third day of my trip dawned I was down some $300 without a winning session or lasting more than 30 minutes in any of the four tournaments I had played. My three travelling companions and I entered yet another tournament, and fifteen minutes later I was ousted again. I wandered to the sports book. I'm not brazen enough to think I have a +EV edge in the sports book, but I couldn't bear the thought of putting any more money into poker and a coin-toss sports bet seemed like a comforting alternative. I looked over the board, and somewhere in the back of my head a little voice started talking. It said something like "when everything else has turned its back on you, what's the one thing you can count on?"

I knew what the answer was. "The Cubs failing." But I shoved the voice away and headed back to the poker room. There I found my three friends- guys I have thrashed in our home game week in and week out for years- sitting side by side by side at the final table. It was time to bet against the Cubs.

I returned to the sports book, and with a final check of Chris Capauano's ERA I dropped $200 on the Milwaukee Brewers +120. I then returned to my hotel room for a quick nap. Two hours later I opened one eye and checked the ticker on the deuce- Cubs 0, Brewers 7. Milwaukee tacked on two more before it was over, and I went on to finish ahead in every ring session the rest of the trip and go deep in to two tourneys as well.

Of course, what you know now and I didn't know then was I had personally sent the Cubs into a historic offensive tailspin they show no signs of getting out of. I feel bad about it- really I do- but its mitigated by the knowledge that Dusty's managing and Hendry's roster would have probably done it if I hadn't. Stupid Cubs.

posted by Scott at 3:46 AM : |

 

World Baseball Classic proves just about nothing

Japan topped Cuba 10-6 to win the inaugural WBC Monday. It was a game that both teams clearly cared about, and at least half the crowd seemed passionate about it as well. There were admittedly some yawning white boys in the mix, but the older Japaneese couple with the rising sun flag jumping up and down in the midst of a bunch of guys with Cuban flags seemed more representative.

So Japan is the champion, and their fans are celebrating. This is all well and good. And yet some people think it means more. I'm just going to cherry pick a few choice comments so I can make myself feel good by calling other people dumb today. Here goes!
John Donovan of si.com writes:

So it follows ... the best Japanese team ever, beating the best competition the world has ever offered. Can there be any doubt? Japan is the best.

This is an absurd conclusion on so many different levels. First, the "best competition the world has ever offered" isn't the same as "the best competition there is." You couldn't reasonably make the conclusion with most teams missing many or most of their best players. More importantly, this was a tiny sample size. The US played just six games. When 162 games is often not enough to determine which team is truely the best, six certainly isn't close. Donovan goes so far as to proclaim Japan "the best" based on one lousy game, the 10-6 win over Cuba. The only thing a baseball tournament like this proves is who is the champion, not who is the best.

Hal Bodley attributes Japan and Cuba outdoing the US and Dominica to fundamentals:

If there was one lesson to be learned, it's that Japan, Cuba, Mexico and South Korea excelled at fundamentals. It was so evident these countries played the game the way it's supposed to be played.

Scott Miller at sportsline.com agrees:

It's a whole lot of little things, things once were important in blue-collar America but no longer seem so emphasized in white-collar America. Things like attention to detail and the heavy lifting kind of work that doesn't necessarily get the glory or make the headlines.

There we have it- the results of the World Baseball Classic had more to do with Marxist class struggle than anything else. Its too bad, because I really thought the US team was inoculated against charges of not caring about fundamentals by including the ultimate fundamentalist Derek Jeter (two errors in six games.) Anyway, I hope Hal and Scott enjoyed the final, where Japan (three errors) defeated Cuba (one error and eight pitchers). A purists dream come true.

Sarcasm aside, it was a very good tournament won by a deserving Japan. They haven't proven themselves the greatest baseballing nation anymore than the US hockey team proved they were better than the Russians in 1980, but like the US hockey team they won the championship and they should be proud.
posted by Scott at 12:25 PM : |

 

Canada 8, USA 6

There are a ton of problems with the World Baseball Classic, but despite Selig's best efforts to make it a failure I have to admit that I'm paying attention to this tournament. Despite it all, the sight of passionate fans waving flags and screaming their lungs out (be it a few dozen for US/Canada or a stadium full for Dominica/Venezuela) gets me going.

That said, the structure of the tournament is so terrible that a big part of me was rooting for the US to get mercy-ruled today. I was literally bouncing around my living room with gleeful anticipation when we trailed 8-0 in the fifth. That dream slipped away, as did the potential joy of A-Rod's pathetic popout ending the game when the Canadian center fielder saw it pop out of his glove, but the result still highlights some of the myriad problems with Bud's baby.

• Wrong time of year- Most of the players and especially the pitchers aren't in game shape. The tournament could be held at the end of March, mid-summer, or after the World Series, but early March is pretty much the worst possible time.
• Wrong players- Any international tournament where half the best players skip out lacks credibility. Where are Ichiro and Matsui? Why are most of the missing players happily playing Cactus and Grapefruit League games when they should be representing their countries?
• Wrong rules- Pitch count limits? Mercy rules? Painful blows to the chances of fans taking the tournament seriously.
• Wrong format- Baseball simply doesn't work in tiny sample sizes. Its not at all surprising to get results like Canada (leadoff man: Pete Orr, #2 hitter: Stubby Clapp) over the US in one game. Without longer series, results will be so random they can hardly be taken seriously.

I hope somehow these problems are fixed and a credible, viable international tournament emerges. No sporting event on the face of the earth matches the World Cup for sporting passion largely because it is shared by nations competing on relatively equal footing, but a true Baseball World Cup could come close. It would be nice to be able to care about a Star Spangled Nine without wanting them to lose to spite Bud Selig.

posted by Scott at 7:45 PM : |

 

Kirby Puckett

You've probably read that Kirby Puckett died yesterday afternoon. Everywhere I've looked on the internet, people are mourning the loss of a beloved man and a great baseball player. Thats entirely appropriate, and fine as far as it goes, and yet...

Its driving me absolutely nuts reading so many effusive comments and stories about Kirby Puckett today, virtually every one of which ignores or glosses over the rather important fact that he was a serial abuser of women. Everywhere I go- from Baseball Think Factory to Fark, commenters are bemoaning the loss of the great Kirby Puckett. Anyone who says anything to the contrary is castigated as a terrible human being for speaking such awful words.

Counting only those incidents that made the papers, he beat up his wife throughout their sixteen year marriage, beat up a mistress he kept throughout his marriage, and dragged a stranger into the men's room of a restaurant where he sexually assaulted her. I understand the desire to accentuate the positive in the immediate aftermath of a man's passing, especially an athlete that gave happy memories to so many people. I can go along with recapping the highlights of his career at the expense of a sober analysis of whether he deserved to make the Hall of Fame on merit. I can accept Twins fans reminiscing about the joy he brought them as children. I can't fathom doing all of this and ignoring the fact that he brutalized women on a regular basis. For me, and presumably for his victims, his passing is not enough of a reason to let bygones be bygones.

posted by Scott at 3:09 AM : |

 
For a seven-year period, Sammy Sosa was the biggest star the Cubs franchise has ever seen. The 1998 home run chase was arguably the most memorable baseball event in a generation or more, and the fact that it carried the Cubs to a postseason birth made it all the more satisfying. From 1998 Sosa's production remained at an All-Star level through 2003, a year which again found the Cubs in the postseason. Sosa hit just .188 in the NLDS but did manage six walks for a .409 OBP, then hit .308/.455/.577 in the NLCS.

If it had ended there, Sosa's place in the Cubs' pantheon would be secure. Instead, steroid rumors and grumbles about his attitude mounted as his production began to wane. He was finally shipped to Baltimore last season, whereupon his production fell off a cliff (.671 OPS in 424 PA last year.)

Of course, you probably know all that. Tonight his agent is saying we've "seen Sosa in a baseball uniform for the last time." Opinions on Sosa range from extreme vitriol to warm appreciation. I tend toward the latter. I'm sure he didn't have the ideal team-first attitude, but that hardly makes him unique among star baseball players. I recognize there is a real chance he was using steroids for some or all of his time in baseball, but again that can also be said for hundreds of his peers. What is certain is that he was a huge contributor to two Cubs playoff teams including the best Cubs season in the last sixty years. He was directly responsible for most of the positive Cubs memories I've had since he joined the team, and I expect I'll always remember those moments fondly.

So here's to a few of the good times-

• May 25, 1998- I'm at Turner Field for a precursor to his record-breaking June
• September 13, 1998- Sammy ties and passes Maris in an 11-10 extra-inning win
• September 28, 1998- Sosa goes 2-4 with two runs scored as Cubs capture wildcard playoff over SF
• September 2, 2003- I'm at Wrigley as Sammy ends game two of the greatest series ever played
• October 7, 2003- Sosa very nearly steals game one with two-out in the bottom of the ninth

posted by Scott at 1:31 AM : |

 

Rebirth

These are the nicest of all possible words: Pitchers and catchers.

Its been a long cold winter. I've quit my job and lost my one true love, but the one constant through all the winters has been inept Cubs management and I'll be damned if that hasn't turned out to be true once again. There are a smorgasbord of reasons to think this edition of the Cubs will fare no better than the last ninety-seven, and yet... pitchers and catchers report today. Pitchers and catchers!

Most breaking news or analysis posts I do this year will be over at Gonfalon Cubs. I'll be posting Cubs thoughts of a more personal (read: anguished) nature here as well as the CBA Prediction Contest and any other random useless things that I feel like getting off my chest (it is, after all, a blog.) There may even be a Dennis sighting at some point during the year, although I make no promises.

In Mesa today, a bunch of guys are putting on spikes and garish spring training warmup gear. For a day at least, hope springs eternal. Go Cubs!
posted by Scott at 12:10 AM : |